Court rules governing divorces require that each party provide certain financial documents and a completed financial affidavit to the other party within 45 days of the service of the petition or before any temporary relief hearing. The extent of the information to be provided depends on the annual income and expenses of each party. Failure to provide this information can result in the court dismissing the case or not considering that party's requests. The parties or the court can modify these requirements except for the filing of a financial affidavit, which is mandatory in all cases.

Some couples agree on property settlements, child custody, and other post-divorce arrangements before or soon after the original petition is filed. They then enter into a written agreement signed by both parties that is presented to the court. In such an uncontested case, a divorce can become final in a matter of a few weeks.

Other couples disagree on some issues, work out their differences, and appear for a final hearing with a suggested settlement which is accepted by the judge.

Mediation is a procedure to assist you and your spouse in working out an arrangement for reaching agreement without a protracted process or a trial. Its purpose is not to save a marriage, but to help divorcing couples reach a solution to their problems and arrive at agreeable terms for handling their dissolution. Many counties have mediation services available; some are mandatory.

Finally, some couples cannot agree on much of anything and a trial-with each side presenting its case-is required. The judge makes the final decision on contested issues.

The equitable dissolution process is designed to make the divorce as fair as possible to both husband and wife, which usually means negotiation-and compromise-by both partners.

Attorneys have learned it is unrealistic to expect both partners to be "happy" with their divorce. The experience can be emotionally devastating. The financial upheaval of supporting two households instead of one causes hardship for the entire family. The parties, however, can take steps to make the process easier for themselves and their children.